O Lord of Heaven’s Armies, God of Israel, I have been bold enough to pray this prayer to you because you have revealed all this to your servant, saying, ‘I will build a house for you—a dynasty of kings!’ For you are God, O Sovereign Lord . Your words are truth, and you have promised these good things to your servant.
2 Samuel 7:27-28
There seems to be an unwritten rule in Christianity that says we can’t be honest about our feelings. We have feelings of doubt, fear, or lack of faith, but because we believe the lie that we are alone in our thinking we hide those feelings inside.
What makes it worst is when our doubt and fear are directed to God. Perhaps it’s a hard decision, or an unexpected outcome, we find ourselves believing God exists but doubting the goodness in his sovereignty.
I have been there, in fact, I find myself here in this place often. Believing with my whole heart that God exists, but not expressing that I doubt his ability to provide. I know he can, and I have seen him personally do amazing things in the lives of others, but I can’t extend that belief to my own circumstances. So, I fill my days with “foul proof” plans and good things, and swallow the uneasy feeling that although I am doing well, I am still operating in my own will and leaning on my own understanding.
I am in essence restricting my walk with God based on my understanding. Nothing is impossible to God, he is only limited by my faith. How stinking convicting!
The positive, however, is this. God knew where I would struggle. He knew the places that would prove to be hard for me. He knew that I would need encouragement and he gave me his word to help me along the way.
He gave us access to Him and His power through our Savior Jesus Christ. I am encouraged by this simple truth. Through Jesus, we can petition the father directly. We can be bold in our prayers and our praise!
Pray with me: Heavenly Father, help me to see that you are able to do all things. I believe that you are present and active in my life, but if I am honest, I doubt that I good enough for your blessings. I doubt that I have earned the right to your help in my life. Help me to see that I am enough and that you love me and walk through this life with me because of your love! In Jesus’ name, Amen